What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore

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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!

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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.

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