What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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