What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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