What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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