What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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