What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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