What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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