What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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