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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?
Seven months old.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?
With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?
Squeaky clean
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",
he said, "Those are pickled onions".
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?
Spelling.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They have machines to do that now.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?
It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,
and then it dawned on me.
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What can you hold without using your hands?
Your breath!
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?
She wanted to see a butterfly.
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