What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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