What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore

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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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