What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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