What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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