What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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