What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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