What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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