What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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