What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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