Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
or
As far away as possible.
or
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"
or
Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
or
It was beat.
or
Nothing, it shuts them up!
or