What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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