What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.

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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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