What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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