What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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