What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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