What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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