What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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