What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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