What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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