What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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