What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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