What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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