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What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??
What's a light bulb?
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
All of them.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.
Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?
He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What is black and white and red all over?
A skunk with a rash.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?
Terrorists have sympathizers
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Why do ducks fly south?
Because it's too far to walk!
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."
"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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