What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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