What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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