What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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