What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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