What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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