What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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