What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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