What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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