What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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