What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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