What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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