What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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