What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.

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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.

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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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