What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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