What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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