What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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