What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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