What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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