What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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