What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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