What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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