What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer

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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.

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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!

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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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