What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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