What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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