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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?
A try and try and try-ceratops
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?
It might be your bicycle.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.
It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?
Catillacs
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?
To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?
Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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