What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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