What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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