What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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