What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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