What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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