What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle

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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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