What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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