What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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