What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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