What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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