What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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