What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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