What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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