What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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