What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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