What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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