What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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