What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.

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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!

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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.

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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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