What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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