What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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