What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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