What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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