What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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