What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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