What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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