What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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