What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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