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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?
A ruler.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?
None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,
if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?
coz Donald ducked
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What can you hold without using your hands?
Your breath!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?
A sandwich!
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?
He was in shock for a week.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?
A workaraunt.
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