What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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