What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them

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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.

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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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