What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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