What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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