What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.

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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .

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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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