What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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