What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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