What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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