What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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