What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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