What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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