What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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