What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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