What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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