What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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