What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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