What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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