What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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