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What do you call a loony spaceman?
An astronut.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?
Because it goes good with chips.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?
He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?
Laboratory Retrievers
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?
Answer: The back of his head.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?
None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
Is that you mommy?
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them
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