What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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