What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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