What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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