What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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