What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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