What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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