What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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A seal walks into a club...
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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