What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.


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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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