What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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