What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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