What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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