What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.

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