What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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