What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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