What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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