What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.

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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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