What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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