What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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