What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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