What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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