What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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