What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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