What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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