What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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