What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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