What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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