What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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