What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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