What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.

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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.

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