What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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