What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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