What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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