What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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