What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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