What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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