What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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