What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.

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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth

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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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