What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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