What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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