What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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