What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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