What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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