What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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