What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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