What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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