What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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