What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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