What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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