What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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