What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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