What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda

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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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