What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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