What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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