What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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