What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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