What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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