What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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