What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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