What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.

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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon

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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.

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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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