What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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