What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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