What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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