What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.

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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.

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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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