What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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