What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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