What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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