What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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