What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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