What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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