What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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