What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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