What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''

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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over

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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.

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