What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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