What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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