What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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