What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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