What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.

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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.

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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.

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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.

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