What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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