What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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