What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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