What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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