What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.

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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.

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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card

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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.

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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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