What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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