What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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