What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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