What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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