What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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