What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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