What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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