What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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