What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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