What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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