What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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