What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!

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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.

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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.

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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.

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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.

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