What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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