What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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