What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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